Dad and his beloved mother.
He didn't have the greatest
relationship with his dad
and this probaby affected how he parented
me and my brother.
Dad was about 2 here, 1941.
My dad - wedding photo, 1963.
He was 23 when he married my mom who was 21.
I look back now and think - my goodness - they were just babies!
I was born 11 months later.
He was 23 when he married my mom who was 21.
I look back now and think - my goodness - they were just babies!
I was born 11 months later.
Dad, circa 1972.
He was about 33.
He was often away for two or three months at
a time on business. He was a workoholic.
Possibly an alcoholic.
His mindset was very old school.
We were pretty scared of my dad and the neighbour
kids loved to tell me they didn't like him.
Even though I understood why they didn't like him
it hurt like hell to hear it.
May 1995
My dad was so proud of his grandsons!
Tim was 12 and Luke was 10.
Dad died 3 months later.
He was 55.
Cause of death? Check out the ubiquitous
cigarette in the left portion of the photo.
My dad was so proud of his grandsons!
Tim was 12 and Luke was 10.
Dad died 3 months later.
He was 55.
Cause of death? Check out the ubiquitous
cigarette in the left portion of the photo.
Luke and Dad are twins - Dad LOVED
to be the center of attention and the life of the party,
oozed charm and charisma - and Luke is exactly the same.
They also drive the rest of us nuts!
to be the center of attention and the life of the party,
oozed charm and charisma - and Luke is exactly the same.
They also drive the rest of us nuts!
When my dad died suddenly of a heart attack we were semi-estranged. It took quite a few years before I could find some peace regarding his death. I think a lot of that had to do with the fact that we were both hurting. We had inflicted a lot upon each other because both of us expected so much from the other but in our weakness and hurt came up terribly short.
We were also very much alike - impulsive, reactive, impatient, self-righteous and man - do we have LOUD voices! He loved food, talking and travelling and so do I. When we do something we do it BIG.
In the parenting department we didn't do so well. Oh, my brother and I turned out OK and so did my kids but our appetite for life often put us at odds with the self-sacrifice that good parenting demands.
My father had no use for the Church and I often wonder if I would be as enthusiastic about my faith if he were alive. It would have been a huge bone of contention between us. I wonder if it would have hindered my conversion to be worried about what he would have thought and said about it.
I feel quite sure my mother at least made it to Purgatory but my dad...I don't know. The Divine Mercy devotion gives me hope though. St. Faustina wrote in her Diary (1507) "All Grace flows from mercy and the last hour abounds with mercy for us. Let no one doubt concerning the goodness of God; even if a person's sins were as dark as night, God's mercy is stronger than our misery. One thing alone is necessary: that the sinner set ajar the door of his heart, be it ever so little, to let in a ray of God's merciful grace, and then God will do the rest." I hope that as my dad lay dying on the kitchen floor that he opened his heart just that little bit to let Jesus in.
Yesterday as I was mucking out my computer room I found my July 2009 EWTN newsletter and the header contained a Mother Angelica quote (God bless her practical soul!) She wrote, "Allow people to love you as they must love you, not as you want them to love you. Even God does not love us as we wish Him to. Learning to love is learning to accept love as it comes. "
Soothing words for a wounded heart.
Happy Father's Day, Daddy. I miss your bear hugs SO much. (And I know I was your favorite because you told me so.)
We were also very much alike - impulsive, reactive, impatient, self-righteous and man - do we have LOUD voices! He loved food, talking and travelling and so do I. When we do something we do it BIG.
In the parenting department we didn't do so well. Oh, my brother and I turned out OK and so did my kids but our appetite for life often put us at odds with the self-sacrifice that good parenting demands.
My father had no use for the Church and I often wonder if I would be as enthusiastic about my faith if he were alive. It would have been a huge bone of contention between us. I wonder if it would have hindered my conversion to be worried about what he would have thought and said about it.
I feel quite sure my mother at least made it to Purgatory but my dad...I don't know. The Divine Mercy devotion gives me hope though. St. Faustina wrote in her Diary (1507) "All Grace flows from mercy and the last hour abounds with mercy for us. Let no one doubt concerning the goodness of God; even if a person's sins were as dark as night, God's mercy is stronger than our misery. One thing alone is necessary: that the sinner set ajar the door of his heart, be it ever so little, to let in a ray of God's merciful grace, and then God will do the rest." I hope that as my dad lay dying on the kitchen floor that he opened his heart just that little bit to let Jesus in.
Yesterday as I was mucking out my computer room I found my July 2009 EWTN newsletter and the header contained a Mother Angelica quote (God bless her practical soul!) She wrote, "Allow people to love you as they must love you, not as you want them to love you. Even God does not love us as we wish Him to. Learning to love is learning to accept love as it comes. "
Soothing words for a wounded heart.
Happy Father's Day, Daddy. I miss your bear hugs SO much. (And I know I was your favorite because you told me so.)
♥♥♥
